I have given my fair share of hugs to those who look like they need it. I've tried my best to clear out the cloud of my own self absorption in order to make room for the cares and concerns that our members are going through. I try to ask questions, offer a listening ear and follow through on prayers I promise I'll make. I've made meals for new moms, those recovering from surgery or for people who are sick. I've worked alongside our women's group to make and serve food for funerals. I've been at the funeral homes and hugged the grieving family members as they struggle to come to terms with saying goodbye to their loved one. I've played my violin, however imperfect, as an accompaniment to a funeral service. I've done none of this perfectly and am fully aware that I've missed plenty of opportunities to show Christian love over the years. But this is what we do, we who are bought by the blood of the Lamb and are just so very grateful for His love and compassion that we try and show love and compassion to others as best we can.
Wayne, in his vocation as pastor, has served countless families and individuals over the years. He has been with his members through their highs of weddings and baptisms to the earthly lows of sickness and death. He has patiently sat with people in their homes or at their hospital bedside. He's held their hand, listened patiently as a good friend and administered the Sacrament to them when they couldn't get to church. He's brought the Word of God to them. He's comforted widows and widowers. He's sat with the dying, so that the final words they hear are the ones that offer real Comfort. He's worked with a number of different funeral homes, arranged the services and guided the families in picking out the sermon text and hymn songs. He was the one called to the hospital when the one who lay dying had no family or friends to come. He gives what's been given to him and as a vessel that Christ uses to speak words of Truth and Love : that Christ gave of Himself as a ransom for all people. (1 Tim 2:6)
Up until recently, we have been on the giving end. We've given, not always knowing what it means to those receiving it. We've given, because it's just the right thing to do. We've given, sometimes despite ourselves. We've given, because we've been given so much through Christ.
Recently, we've been the ones who have been on the receiving end of love. When news of my father-in-laws passing was made known, endless emails, Facebook messages and personal condolences were made. Wayne's email box was visible proof that people cared for him and were grieving his loss. Our members graciously gave him the time off he needed. Members were at my front door at 4:45am to take us to the airport. A meal was brought over in anticipation of the busyness of Holy Week around the corner. Prayers were said for our family in public worship.
When the individual families of our clan all flew in from afar to Calgary for the funeral, the love continued to pour in. All together, we make a group of 16. We were lovingly fed and every meal we ate together was provided by someone who gave to us. Our bodies were nourished by the very souls Jesus redeemed. Never before in my life did a meat tray and bag of buns make so much sense to me. How could home baked pies manage to be enjoyed so much? The warmth and comfort of lasagna was never appreciated more. The wild game BBQ was a treat. And the chilli brought with the announcement that it's secret ingredient was love was , we all agreed, a hit!
We arrived at the church - the same one where Wayne and I spoke our marriage vows and where two nieces and a nephew were baptized into faith - where now the earthly body of Jake would enter and leave one last time. As family and friends came and went for the visitation, another meal was served for the family in the basement. Food enough to feed an army awaited us and we enjoyed a respite from the heaviness upstairs.
Once the visitation concluded, the family and those that wanted to stay were led by the pastor in devotion. What Wayne has done for many families before was now being done for us. God is so good!! The same pastor who married us and baptized family members was now the one to bury the first of us. The same pastor who inspired my husband many years ago to go into the ministry was now ministering to us. The same pastor who went on holidays with my in-laws, spent countless Christmases and Easters together when extended family was absent was now the one to bury his friend. Through his personal grieving, his task was clear - to comfort the grieving family with the hope and assurance from Jesus Himself through the words of John in Revelation of the New Jerusalem, our eternal home in heaven. "Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." Revelation 21:1-4
Flower arrangements arrived for the funeral including one from our own congregation. It meant so much to have their presence there in a sweet smelling way. The funeral arrangements were made with the pastor but with Wayne on the other end. The nearby funeral home had as it's long time employee a woman whom my brother-in-law had been best man in her wedding. It was more than arrangements and business she made with the family as the connection was worthy of her own family attending the visitation. It all ran like clockwork despite the fact that we were winging it.
The funeral itself drew upwards 400 attendees. And the message spoken by the pastor had nothing to do with the life of Jake. As Jake would have wanted, it had everything to do with the life - and death - and resurrection of Christ! In a room full of people who had crossed paths with my father-in-law throughout his lifetime, the hope that we as a family have, that he had, was preached loud and clear to the crowd. "For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day - and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing." 2 Timothy 4:6-8.
The pastor's wife and also sister-in-Christ to our family, played the hymns on the grand piano. The pastor offered up his own offering of a verse solo as a witness to the crowd and a gift for his departed friend. Their hearts were beautiful as they gave of themselves and Christ's love met us right there in the front row. As their own hearts were grieving for a friend lost, they gave of themselves so generously.
The reception that followed afterward was not catered by a fancy-schmancy service but by the church family that shared in our loss. Once more, the amount of food was ample for the huge crowd but that it was all made as an offering of time and resources made it all the more delicious. There were no eulogies made, although I've no doubt there were plenty of stories to be told. There was my husband at the microphone, the pastor through and through, that announced to those who had expressed a desire to help in any way, that they could honour that offer by coming to church with us the next day. That's what Jake would have wanted - to offer another opportunity for people to hear what Jesus has done for them. For him. Another opportunity for any and all to hear, "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope though the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade - kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time." 1 Peter 1:3-5.
We are all on the receiving end of love. Out of love, God sent His Son to save us through His perfect life, death and resurrection. Out of love, God brings us to faith and changes our hearts to believe in Him. Out of love, He gives us every good and perfect gift. He opens our hands to receive His love.
1 comment:
Thanks for sharing this, Rachel! Your family has been in our prayers each night since we first heard the news. Christ is risen!
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