Moving On

I know I have been remiss in keeping this updated as my mother so lovingly pointed out;) I'm going to try not to get too wordy and stick to highlights and post the good pictures to keep Oma happy. 

In my defence, I've been a little busy.

After the announcement of Palm Sunday, we dove right into Holy Week and Easter. There wasn't a lot of time to lolly gag. 

There was a Christian Seder Supper that was wedged in there and didn't get any pictures taken of apparently. We also didn't get an Easter family picture taken. But I got the kids and they're the cutest anyway. 

Will went back to school Easter Monday. Fran returned to Calgary on Wednesday after Easter. 

The following week was pastors' conference in Toronto. Zanna and I had already planned on going and staying with the Henrichs in  Markham. We made plans to meet up with the Gumms at the Toronto Zoo. 

We pretty much had the place to ourselves seeing as it was a random Tuesday in April and it was stinking cold. That meant there was plenty of photo ops since we didn't have to share the space with scads of kids. 

I love these gals! They are some of my fellow pastor's wives who are such blessings in my life! We may do the pastor's wife gig in different ways but we are connected in faith, in our desire to serve in our vocations, and the uniqueness of life in the ministry. They are my cheerleaders and comrades and I thank God for them! 

The next week Wayne and I left for a week in Texas. This was a reality check. 

We're not in Ontario anymore

First of all, we left Zanna home mainly due to some activities she was committed to that made it hard to miss. The day Wayne accepted the call I tearfully called my longtime homeschool friend, Christine, and told her what just happened. And then I asked her to prayerfully consider taking my child into her home for the week. She immediately accepted without hesitation. I never worried about Zanna while we were away because I was so confident she was in good hands. Thank God for good friends!! 

Meanwhile Wayne and I were off on our next adventure and headed to the Lone Star State. We spent the first evening at Brent and Chantal's in nearby DFW area and enjoyed seeing their kids and visiting their home for the first time. 

The next day was off to East Texas known as the Piney Woods area where Wayne accepted the call to. We spent the week meeting some of the members of our new congregation, house hunting, and getting to know the area better. We stayed at Camp Shiloh in a nice, cozy cabin. 

First impressions: 

to begin with, there was no snow. So that was a good place to start. After a brutally long winter this was a welcome reprieve. However I've lived in Texas before to know that by the time we move down there it'll be hottern' hades (that's hotter than hell in Texas speak). 

it was beautiful - it felt familiar yet uniquely Texan. Lots of trees, lakes and sunshine thrown in with fields of Texas bluebonnets and longhorns. Sigh .... 

the people are friendly - all of them. Coming from the rudest place I've ever lived (I love you, Ottawa, but you are mean - with the exception of some of the nicest people here I know) this was a joyful welcome! Wayne got all excited because an employee in Walmart actually helped him and then blessed his day. Welcome to Texas. 

I don't think I can imagine that our week in Texas could have gone any better. We met some very nice church members who had us over to their homes a number of times. We got to know fresh faces and make WELS connections. We had the privilege of worshiping with the group that will be our new family down there. We communed over the Lord's Supper and then shared a meal afterwards to fill our bellies. There was (unsweetened) iced tea involved that reminded us this was a southern meal. 

Two men from the church gave us a personal car ride around what will be our mission field. We got stories both personal and of the area. They were very gracious with their time.

Our realtor, Ralph, was all Texan through and through and knew that area like the back of his hand. We figured it must be a pretty safe area to be in if he leaves his keys in the ignition. We learned some back roads as he maneuvered our way from house to house. We got stories, were taken to some local restaurants, and generally given the lay of the land and then some! We found a house that we walked into and said, "Well shoot, this is home. What do we gotta do to make this happen?" And then they accepted our offer a few days later. 

We ended our last night in the area with new friends around a table of Texas BBQ and a game of hand of foot. 

We got home and hit the ground running which is how it usually goes after a trip. Zanna had her end of season synchronized swimming show. All of their hard work from the year payed off in their final routine! 

She also had a workshop at the area science museum where they did experiments on electrical circuits. 

Then there was the yearly Lutheran Girl Pioneer Mother's Day tea. The girls had been busy preparing for a puppet show complete with homemade puppets and stage decorations! Zanna was also awarded some charms she had been working towards. We are so grateful to have had this program and have been blessed by the special ladies that run it. It wasn't at our own church but the church downtown. They always accepted us with open arms! 

We had our final WINKLE here - which is what we call it when we get together with the area WELS pastors and their families. The Gumm family came up from New York and stayed the night before with us so they could join the group the next day. 

For Mother's Day Wayne and Zanna took me out to one of our favourite special restaurants that's on our bucket list to hit one more time before we leave - the restaurant at Le Cordon Bleu cooking school. It's amazing.

My beef stew never looks like this

Finally, we celebrated our last day of homeschool with a trip to the local fro-yo shop. It's all about the food:)

Next up: I'll make a separate post about our recent Wisconsin trip which includes Will's graduation. 

Homesick

Soon we are home and shall stand before him;

What matter then that we have suffered here?

Then he shall crown us while we adore him;

So death and all our pains will disappear.

CW 364 vs. 3

I've been kind of bitter about it. 

Wayne doesn't receive a call for 10 years then seemingly out of the blue he gets one to Edmonton that he ends up turning down. We resigned ourselves to assuming we will most likely be here for a LONG time mainly due to immigration hurdles that would drastically narrow down the field of possibilities. Some conversations even included the idea of staying here until he retires. Regardless, we were at peace with where we're at and counted our stability as a huge blessing that has allowed us many freedoms. 

Until.

6 months later and Wayne receives another call. This time it's to Texas and this time it's different. And the part that made me bitter was that it was messing up my Lent. 

I love Lent and not because I'm a glutton for punishment and am looking to give up a habit for 40 days that I probably should anyway. I get a lot out of taking a season to repent and reflect on my need for a Saviour. I gain a renewed appreciation of what Jesus accomplished for my salvation by reliving his hardships and anguish as he walked to the cross for me. I stand with centuries of believers that take the time every year to imagine what the disciples experienced, to hear the parables Jesus taught the people himself and the way that the passion unfolded. I stand with the Mary's and John at the foot of that horrible event that must have seemed so hopeless and scary at the time. I too await the answers yet to come.

And now this Lent of 2018 was screwed up! It hung over our heads and hearts. It kept us awake for weeks. I cried tears and Wayne made phone calls. It started to dawn on me that maybe we were no longer home. And while our family at our church would always be part of our family of believers,  maybe there was another church out there that was to be that too. 

I love this home that we live in. I've relished decorating it to my taste, expressing my personality in every corner. I've arranged family photos so that they surround us at every turn and remind us of where we come from and who our people are. I've built a home business that not only supplements our income but blesses me with people so that my extroverted side is happy happy happy while my introverted side is still cozy in my surroundings. I've schooled our children in these walls and fought hard battles of parenting along with hugs and laughter and love. We brought Zanna here to this home off the plane from China. I picked the perfect pink colour for her baby room - pink cadillac. I've gone all out for Christmas so that there is NO WHERE you can go in this house and not know that Jesus is coming as a baby in a manger.  Don't even get me started on Easter. 

That's just my house. 

Then there are the people in my life that are near and dear to me both at church and in other areas. People have come and gone in 16 years but the ones that have remained constant through thick and thin I need. No really. Some of these friends have even seen me hungry, hot, and in a crowd and they still like me! As I mentally scroll through the list of friends I have, it occurs to me that each is a gift to me that encourages me in some area of life whether homeschooling, church work, pastor's wife, adoption and parenting, or commiserating in some way. Now why on earth would I want to walk away from a tailor made support group that took me 16 years to assemble?! 

On Palm Sunday, Wayne accepted the call to Texas and announced it from the pulpit at the conclusion of service. And even though a person can't technically ruin Palm Sunday it kind of felt like we did. It was as if a cloud had descended over this group that had just finished shouting their hosannas. I was ready to throw my husband under the bus to give the impression that "I don't know what this guy is thinking. I'm just the innocent wife that has to do what he says"in an attempt to distance myself. But I didn't. I kept my eyes on the ground as much as possible and hugged those that wanted to hug. 

I already felt homesick and was looking for somewhere to be sick. 

And then I realized this is Lent too. It's feeling homesick. It's realizing that I've gotten way too comfortable making this place my be all and end all home. 

It's a struggle to find that balance between making your house a home, blooming where your planted, and when in Rome... with a yearning for an eternal communion with Christ where we'll sing with the angels and worship Him in perfection. We get a taste of this in our worship, hymns, liturgy, and sacraments. We ache for home. But this is not home. This home can lure us with it's comforts and pleasures. It can seem to fulfill all our needs. But it never will. This is not our real home. As we kneel at the communion rail and become one with Christ and with those at the table, we are reminded that there's something more and that this is but a taste of what's yet to come. We should be homesick for that eternal home that Christ bought entry for us with his own flesh and blood. We'll never feel homesick there! 

I'm very grateful the Lord has shown this to me. Lent has taken on a richer and deeper meaning that I didn't realize was possible. I look forward to celebrating Easter joy with my fellow church family as together we rejoice in Jesus' triumph over sin and death! I ache for the day that our joy will be complete and we stand together with the angels praising God!

Then I'll be home.

Lent 2018

I'll Be Good

Jaymes Young

I thought I saw the devil
This morning
Looking in the mirror, drop of rum on my tongue
With the warning
To help me see myself clearer
I never meant to start a fire
I never meant to make you bleed
I'll be a better man today

I'll be good, I'll be good
And I'll love the world, like I should
Yeah, I'll be good, I'll be good
For all of the time
That I never could

My past has tasted bitter
For years now
So I wield an iron fist
Grace is just weakness
Or so I've been told
I've been cold, I've been merciless
But the blood on my hands scares me to death
Maybe I'm waking up today

I'll be good, I'll be good
And I'll love the world, like I should
I'll be good, I'll be good
I'll be good, I'll be good

For all of the light that I shut out
For all of the innocent things that I doubt
For all of the bruises I've caused and the tears
For all of the things that I've done all these years
And all
Yeah, for all of the sparks that I stomped out
For all of the perfect things that I doubt

I'll be good, I'll be good
And I'll love the world, like I should
Yeah, I'll be good, I'll be good
For all of the times
I never could, oh, oh-oh
Oh, oh
Oh, oh-oh

For all of the times that I never could.

This is my song for Lent 2018. It's not a hymn. Please don't freak out if you're a Lutheran. I still have my favourite Lenten hymns which include "Go to Dark Gethsemane".  

What I like about a mainstream song is that it can do such a good job capturing the human struggle of bad vs. good, awareness that something is wrong, and cries for help. Without Jesus, their hope will be misplaced. They'll try to find it in themselves, in the good they try to do to make up for the bad they've done. Humans can grasp the concepts of grace and forgiveness but without knowing the source of the undeserved love God shows us through sending His Son, Jesus, these concepts fail to assure. 

Poor Jaymes. I feel the weight of all my sin too.  He resolves to fix it by being a better man in the future. But he will quickly realize that his good intentions have severe limitations and before he knows it, he'll be back in the bathtub wondering why he wasn't stronger. I have no idea if Jaymes Young is a Christian.

 I think his comment about what his music video represents is interesting:

About the music video for ‘I’ll Be Good’, Jaymes said “This video represents the harm we do. We harm ourselves when we harm others. It also reflects the re-birth of a forgiven conscience.” 

I think his use of the butterfly is significant. It makes me think of the butterfly I use in my Lenten Garden that sits on the open tomb on Easter morning. Butterflies represent new life. For Christians, that new life is in Jesus. 

In the video his cuts and bruises show the harm done to himself even when the battle is within. We never escape unscathed. We’re broken and hurt. And so are the people around us that we play a part in hurting. We know we’ve done wrong. We wish we were better. All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Romans 3:23

He sits in a bathtub and immerses himself in the water. Baptism. A washing of rebirth and renewal. Drowning our sins and connecting us to Christ and all that He’s done for us. Don't you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus we baptized into his death? Romans 6:3  (Baptism) ... now saves you also - not the removal of dirt from the body but the pledge of a good conscience toward God. It saves you by the resurrection of Jesus Christ. 1 Peter 3:21  All of you who were baptized into Christ have been clothed with Christ. Galatians 3:27

The fish swimming in the IV drip? That stumped me at first. And it’s weird. I could definitely be reading too much into it but from a Christian perspective it’s brilliant art. The fish has been a symbol of Christian faith in the early church since facing persecution in the Roman Empire. And the purpose of an IV saline solution is to keep you from getting dehydrated. A nurse will hook you up to fluids to keep anything worse from happening to you. Especially if you can’t eat for awhile due to circumstances, this drip will hold you over until you can. The two of these things together show the life support we need to keep going. But it's still weird. 

One of my favourite Psalms this time of year is from chapter 32. David cries out - 

Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered. Blessed is the man against whom the Lord counts no iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit. For when I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was dried up as by the heat of summer. I acknowledged my sin to you and I did not cover up my iniquity; I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,” and you forgave the iniquity of my sin.

David gets to where Jaymes’ lyrics never quite make it. So aware of our sins we cry out to the Lord … and He forgives us. For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. John 3:16

The Wednesday night Lenten services are a must for me to be reminded of what exactly Jesus did to forgive these sins. Payment had to be made for my iniquities. Jesus paid it with His very life and death. This is the path I need to walk before arriving at Easter. 

How to Survive the Winter

I had intended on writing a new year post and now that we're in the middle of February it's not so new of a year anymore. Matter of fact  it's already been enough time for me to have dusted and cleaned all my bathrooms at least twice since the beginning of January. So I guess we're well on our way now aren't we? 

I was excited about the change of calendar because I got to start a new bullet journal. I've been using this method of organizing myself for a year and a half. I will never go back. I put almost everything into this composition style notebook made just for me. Other than the adorable colour and pattern of the notebook, it's not necessarily pretty inside. I'm not an artist. I don't calligraphy. I can barely draw a stick person. For me this method of organizing life is completely utilitarian save for the brightly coloured sticky notes I occasionally use to arrange my thoughts on a whole new level. 

On the inside of my journal I've written my Scripture for the year - Psalm 39:4-8. I've also stapled a copy of the New Year's sermon for quick reference since it was profound. (just scroll down to New Years).  Yep, this method rocks. It's small enough to fit in my purse and big enough to get the job done. All of my thoughts, lists,  ideas, and reminders are in one place and all listed in the front in my Table of Contents I make as I go along. Somebody pinch me! 

I've recently embraced the Danish concept of Hygge. Which really is just putting a name to what I'd be doing anyway - hunkering down for the winter, drinking lots of warm beverages, and keeping my twinkly lights from Christmas up (no led allowed). Unfortunately it offers no motivation for getting exercise, going out in the cold or doing regular housework. I've fine with that. 

I've accumulated a ridiculous amount of tea that I've been working on day by day. For those really cold and long winter days? Somewhere around 4pm if we don't have anything to go out to that evening I put on a pot of Red Rose tea, get out the amaretto and Grand Marnier and settle in for a Blueberry Tea. I prefer a stick of cinnamon in mine. (1 shot each of liquor in mug and fill up with tea). 

Magic!

Another most needed warm beverage that makes the winter bearable is always a mug of hot chocolate. I don't often waste my time with mixes though and came across this incredible easy peasy way of making up a batch of chocolate balls that I keep in a baggie in the freezer. When I'm ready for a mug, simply heat up some milk in the microwave and pop in a chocolate ball stirring until it melts. After another quick zap to get it to the temp I want, another good stir gets some froth going on top and it's ready to go. 

1 (12 oz bag, 2 cups) semisweet chocolate chips
1 cup heavy cream
1/4tsp salt

Microwave chocolate, cream, and salt in large bowl, stirring occasionally, until smooth, about 2 minutes. Refrigerate until firm, about 2 hours. Roll 3 Tablespoons chilled chocolate mixture into ten 2-inch balls. Individually wrap balls in plastic wrap and transfer to zipper-lock bag. Refrigerate for 5 days or freeze for up to 2 month. To make 1 cup of hot chocolate, combine 1 unwrapped chocolate ball and 1 cup whole or low-fat milk in large mug. Microwave, stirring occasionally, until smooth, about 2 minutes. Serve. 

So good!

My love for reading fits the hygge lifestyle perfectly and between the two of us, we can often be found reading something. I've been participating in several Bible studies/book studies that have kept me busy. I read 2000 Demons - No match for my Saviour as part of a Facebook book club. It did not complement the "cozy" atmosphere I was going for and quite frankly, I couldn't read it fast enough so I could move on. Not that it isn't worth reading ... 

I'm studying Walther's Law and Gospel with a fellow pastor's wife and I am loving it! It is just the right balance of intellectually demanding but readable and gives me a whole new appreciation for what my husband and other Lutheran pastors do. I don't know how they aren't freaking out every day with the weight of that on their shoulders but then, it's not them it's the Holy Spirit. 

My eye just twitched. That's what thinking about it does to me. 

I have been living far, far away in the town of Bradbury, Illinois while reading the Anthems of Zion trilogy by Katie Schuermann. I'm currently reading the last instalment and never want it to end. It follows life in this small town and more specifically the individuals in the local Lutheran church. It's reminiscent of the Jan Karon books set in Mitford only Lutheran instead of ... what was it ... Anglican? Anyway, these books have made me look again at my own congregation, the personalities that make it a family, and life in the pastor's house. I've cried like a baby and laughed from the belly. It's precious reading that mirrors the messiness of real life and God's redeeming grace and mercy.

... speaking of the messiness of life - what does it mean when your client brings you a "tip" that hits a little too close to home? Am I that obvious?! BTW - it was yummy;)

Also in the spirit of hygge, I made bread. There is nothing more cozy that the smell of yeast mixed with just ground wheat kernels and the feel of dough stuck to my hands. Wait a minute ... that last part is a big pain and I wonder every single time if it will turn out as it seems no amount of flour will keep it from being a sticky mess. But somehow it works and I get 3 loaves of bread to show from it. 

It took her over three years but Z finally realized there's a vacant room next door to her and she's moved in.

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We also recently realized that she may have been watching too much "Love it or List It" and "Property Brothers" as she's been talking about removing the wall that separates their two rooms. She feels that the extra square footage and carpet upgrade would be beneficial. 

And now Lent is upon us. We sang farewell to our Alleluias on Sunday, and life in a pastor's house gets a bit more complicated and contemplative. I'll be using this free daily devotion throughout Lent. 

This week company arrives in anticipation of Z's birthday and we are looking forward to celebrating 12 years of this amazing young lady we get to call our daughter!

I'll let you know if I think of anything else we need to make it through the rest of winter! 

Dear Maddie: A letter to a future pastor's wife

Dear Maddie,

I am so excited for you! I'm thrilled not just for your upcoming marriage and the happiness that wears all over your face, but I'm also excited for you to join the exclusive club of pastor's wife. Don't get me wrong, you're in for it. By that I mean that you are sure to experience frustrating and difficult times directly related to this vocation.  Those times will come and be assured that the Lord will guide you through them and He will work good out of it. What I want to share with you today are the many blessings that are yet to come because your husband will also be a pastor. What I share with you today is taken from my own experience and you will have your own blessings. Be looking for them!!

Even if you are far from family, your church will become your family. 
I'm not insinuating anyone can replace your mother (heaven forbid!!). But the Lord provides and He will provide you what you need. I remember first arriving to our new home after 2 days of driving, a border crossing, and a 2 year old in the backseat (who was on a Bob the Builder kick). I was tired, nervous, and scared by the time we pulled into the driveway. The semi wouldn't arrive for another few days with our belongings but we found a kitchen pantry stocked with food and a fridge full of needed dairy products, fruits and veggies. The house was clean, the lawn had been recently tended to. Before even meeting the people I would come to know as parishioners, they had already sent their love.
Over the years we've been here, our relationships with many individuals and families have grown roots and are deep. They can be full of verbal affirmation and encouragement, hugs and friendly smiles on a Sunday morning, or thoughtful gifts at Christmas time. This last Christmas, each of my children received a hand-written letter from a dear member who recently became a widow.  In the time that she took to write these notes, she put herself in my kids' shoes. She imagined how excited my son was to be home from school faraway, gave him advise to take with him in the future, and included American money so that he could have a break from cafeteria food. My daughter received a similar thoughtful letter and her's included a piece of jewelry she had searched out just for her. My children's grandparents may not have made it to our home at Christmas but God had deeply touched this special lady to show such grandmotherly love.

You're faith will grow as never before! 
We know that faith grows by being in God's Word and through the Gospel message in the sacrament of the Lord's Supper. There will be plenty of opportunity for both!!

• You will live a liturgical life defined by the church year. This church year is meant to always remind us who we are in Christ and what He has done for us in a predictable and constant cycle so that we never forget. The colours on the altar, the banners that match the season and Sunday theme we are celebrating, the nuances of how the altar is set up and maintained will be on your radar in a way that it wasn't before. It all points to Jesus and is a constant learning opportunity to be reminded of Christ and His work. 
• You will go to church a lot. Unless you are stuck at home with a 104 degree fever or some part of you is bleeding and won't stop, you will most likely will be at church when there's church. I have never regretted going to church. I may drag my feet sometimes to get there but I'm always glad I did. The Word of God never returns to me empty, always speaks to me, always builds me up, always puts my life in perspective. 
• You will have access to your pastor's library AND have lots of opportunity to ask your pastor anything. These men are well trained and well versed in Scripture. They have a personal library to show for it (although younger pastor's may have more books on their computers). If you are reading something theological and a question pops into your head, you can just ask if he happens to be there (or send a text or put a pin in it for later). You can even ask questions you feel silly asking because he loves you know matter what (it's part of the marriage deal). 

You are better "in the know" of what the needs are in a congregation and where you can serve. Not that good works and service are limited to church related areas, but as your faith grows so will your desire to serve others. Sometimes we don't know what to do with that! Not so in the life of ministry. There's always something to do and this is a blessing. 

Everybody has a story. Your church family is a hot mess underneath it all.  I have yet to really find an exception to this rule. We all may have ebbs and flows where life is going a bit easier or we're really going through a trying time. You'll catch any given individual somewhere on that spectrum of life. It may come out as wearing their heart on their sleeve, or they may be really hard to get along with, or they may be the most caring and giving individual. They may be active in the congregation or seldom seen apart from worship. Some will be harder to like than others. 

Why do I list this as a blessing?! 

Because you, dear sister, will be in good company. You and I have stories too. We're hot messes underneath it all which is why we all need Jesus so badly! As Christians we are all struggling with our Old Adam and New Man and it's exhausting!! Knowing this helps especially with those hard to love souls because we're reminded we were all hard to love and Jesus loved us anyway so much so that He died for our sins!  And even though we're all His children through faith and eternal life is ours, we still struggle. Some just hide it better than others. Pray for wisdom to see them as blood-bought souls, for the ability to love their warts and all, and that they might be able to do that for you too. 

Your prayer life will grow.  It often takes some time for people to trust you and know you but when people become honest about their struggles and challenges in life, you may be someone they come to. This is a gift and a high honour when these precious souls entrust their secrets and struggles with you.  You may want to keep a prayer journal because I know when I tell someone that I'll pray for them, I really don't want to forget. I'm a list maker anyway and maybe you're different. I think it's pretty incredible to be able to keep these people in prayer and have a front row seat in seeing how God takes care of them. 

You will be married to a man of God who is in the Word daily. The power of the Holy Spirit changes a man who is regularly feeding his soul with God's Word - not just for work related purposes but to build up his own faith. It's hard to preach to others what they should be doing when you're not doing it yourself so they will hopefully desire to practice what they preach. A faithful pastor will strive to be the spiritual leader in his own home, lead a godly and upright life to not tarnish the good name of the Lord, and be mindful of his own spiritual health. All this he will surely struggle with but if there's a struggle then the fight within is real. He has the Holy Spirit to strengthen him and Jesus to forgive him when (not if) he falls. 

CFW Walther says in the third lecture of Law and Gospel that a pastor should rightly distinguish the difference between Law and Gospel and that both should be taught in every sermon. Not only that but he should approach it in such a way as to preach it to himself first. A pastor is just as miserable a sinner as the rest of his flock and lest he think otherwise, must have the Law convict his heart so that he too sees his need for a Saviour. When this is realized and felt deeply only then can the Gospel show him his Saviour and allow him to rest in the arms of Jesus for real comfort. A person who has not been put through this experience is a sound without meaning, a sounding brass and a tinkling cymbal. But a preacher who has personally passed through this experience can really speak from the heart, and what he says will go into the hearts of this hearers. ... He enters the pulpit a humble man. People can tell whether his preaching comes from the heart or not. (taken from Law and Gospel)

When your pastor preaches in this way week after week, your pastor husband changes. The man I am married to now is not the same man I fell head over heals in love with - he's better. I've seen the evidences of the inward changes and stand in awe of the power of the Holy Spirit. I couldn't ask for more. I am so very blessed to call him husband and to walk by his side through this life on the path to eternity. 

Don't get me wrong - he's not perfect and never will be this side of heaven. Your husband will be sure to disappoint you and you will get to witness his hypocrisy. All the more reason to pray fervently for the man who is your husband and has the responsibility through his vocation to shepherd the flock God has called him to. 

You get to live in the proverbial glass house. At first glance, this is not so great a blessing. Who wants the pressure of their lives on display like that? But honestly, shouldn't all Christians feel this load to a certain extent? As Christians we are all ambassadors of Jesus. People are watching us more than we know. We might as well accept that just being a child of God holds us to a higher standard. We're not in this alone - we couldn't by ourselves. We are redeemed children of God and when He looks at us He sees a glass house with no fingerprints and smudges. The pressure is off and we are free to live our lives for Him. Let them look in the windows! Seek His help in setting a good example, gain wisdom for godly living, and be mentored by those you look up to. And when someone has their nose pressed against the glass (is that a new smudge?!) and witnesses a not so great moment in your life? There's an opportunity to be honest and real about your struggle, contrite in nature, and another moment in life to experience the awesome forgiveness of Jesus. 

Welcome to the pastor's wife club. There's not really a club, per se. There is a private Facebook page though. I kid ... but what I really want to say is that because there's no such thing as the perfect pastor's wife and we all have a vocation in common that helps us relate to one another in a way that's difficult for others, we're in the club. Come as you are. These are some of the nicest people I know. You can unload on them like you can't (and shouldn't) on others but they will also build you up, pray for you, and encourage you in the Word of God like nobody else. They are often down to earth, struggling in their own way, and happy to lend an ear. We can bounce ideas off one another whether ministry related, family and children related, or other. Our kids just might become best buds. They may even go to Prep together but that's jumping ahead of myself ... ;)

The bottom line is - every challenge that we face will be a blessing when the Lord uses it to instruct us. It won't always feel that way at the time but He promises it will work out for His good. 

Maddie, I am honoured to have been your pastor's wife. It has been a joy to watch you grow from a young lady to the women you are now. May God richly bless your marriage and ministry!!

In His Service,

Rachel

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year 2018

Christmas is Coming

Nothing like a good flu and lingering cough to slow me down in an otherwise busy and hectic season. But honestly, aside from being miserable for a solid week and then just slightly annoyed by my cough for another two weeks it's given me a good excuse to get back to the basics. That's not so bad. 

The church ladies and I enjoyed a fun afternoon making our own wreaths. The results were the one I made for our front door and the two for church. They turned out lovely! 

I was really sick the day of Advent by Candlelight so I missed attending, setting my table, and having a lovely evening focused on Christ's coming. However, I managed to make it to the funeral of one of our dear members the day before. There's nothing like having the opportunity to see the results of Christ's coming in the stark reality of death and the comfort found in knowing without a doubt that our salvation is found in the life, death and resurrection of that baby we are waiting for in the season of Advent. 

We had the privilege of knowing Bruce after he had experienced a health scare so extreme a few years back that they thought he wouldn't make it out alive. God had other plans for him though and extended his life here on earth by another 5 years or so. The man we knew had a new lease on life and the gift of clarity to know what was really important in light of eternity. He sat behind me in choir, he was one of my regular clients who let me cut his hair (or what was left of it!), and was a father/grandfather figure to me. I will miss him dearly and look forward to our reunion in heaven. 

We celebrate Advent in our home a number of ways. I always give the kids an Advent calendar, we have our Advent wreath and nightly devotions, and the nativity manger is up but baby Jesus hasn't arrived yet! This year I splurged a little on myself and decided mama needs an Advent calendar too. So Hosanna got a Lego friends, Will and his Prep roommate each got a Kinder surprise, and I got a David's Tea calendar. Every day is a different flavour of tea. I think I might be on to something!

Yes, there should be purple and a pink candle in there. But I ran out and only had white. It's not liturgically correct and frankly, embarrassing;)

Lights have plagued me this season. Lights at church, lights at home, lights outside, other people's lights. I think it was last year I wrote about my extreme hatred for LED lights. It makes me angry. There's nothing warm and cozy about them and they hurt my eyes. So why on earth would I want them on my Christmas tree? I don't.

Last year I purchased boxes and boxes of bulb lights from Target. Wayne was confused as to why I felt I needed ten boxes of lights on our regular sized tree. But really, the only thing worse than a tree with LED lights is a tree with not enough lights. That sweet man still does what I ask even when he may not understand. Last year we had a lot burn out which doesn't bode well for the future. One strand was on the fritz. So I bought two more backup boxes. This year he even verbalized that all those lights look beautiful ... until they all went out. 

There's my tree all lit up with hundreds of ornaments looking practically perfect - until I walked by and not one single bulb was working. Long story short, Wayne saved the day and fixed it without having to completely undress the tree. Thank goodness! But boy those bulbs have been trouble. 

Oh! And not that I want to turn this into a commercial or anything but at Thanksgiving my Mom gave me Mrs. Meyer's Iowa Pine Hand Soap and Dishwashing liquid. It is so Christmasy and I love it! I'm so sad I can't get it in Canada but at least it should last me into Christmas. I'll be stocking up next year for sure! 

I bought this three tiered basket from IKEA last February. I've only seen it that one time and I wasn't even sure I wanted it. I'm so glad I  picked it up when I did! I've had a blast changing it up for the seasons. For winter it's full of hot chocolate and varieties of tea, tins of cinnamon sticks and marshmallows, and winter produce. 

Hosanna and I have been practicing some violin pieces to play over Christmas and the next few Sundays. I love playing with my kids! She's been plowing through her Grade 6 studies and is looking forward to a well deserved break!

Will's last day of school is today! Tis the season where I chew my nails and pray to God (literally) that he makes it home without too much trouble. Between weather and the craziness of the travel season, it's always a sigh of relief when he arrives safely home. I also include in my prayers all the kids travelling home for Christmas. I used to be one of them! I can't wait for Will to get home so I can cut his hair the way I want to hug him to pieces!! 

Also on the Will front, it's official that he's been accepted to Martin Luther College! He plans on pursuing the Bachelor of Arts pre-seminary degree. We are excited to see what plans the Lord has in store for him. 

What's really crazy is that the last time we were on MLC's campus, Wayne graduated. So that was spring of 1998. We were married that summer. Little did we ever dream that 20 years later, our son would start in the fall of 2018! 

On the baking front, there are the yearly treats that all hell would break loose if I didn't make them. That includes wreath cookies and Carmel corn which are both Grandma Nork's recipes. This year I added a crockpot Christmas Crack that sounds horrible (why name a treat after additive drugs?) but the point is that it's addicting. I get it. I also made Nanaimo Balls inspired by the popular and in my opinion one of the yummiest Canadian delicacies - Nanaimo Bars. 

Tonight it's off to Costco for one more pre-Christmas trip. There's a few more gifts to be wrapped. I need some rum. Yes, need. (How else am I going to make Rum Cake and drink eggnog?). I also need to figure what I'm doing for Jesus' birthday cake. 

A Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all! 

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